In my mind the way forward is always clear-cut. Not uncertain or inconvenient or imperfect. When I think about a time when I won’t be needing the wheelchair any more, I see myself just standing up one morning and walking away from my seat. Never needing it again. Perhaps it bursts into flames.

This is not how transitions happen in reality. In the real world I will be changing so slowly I’ll hardly notice. I’ll spend a little less time sitting down, every day. And being up will be unsteady and inconvenient and terrifying. I will need my braces for a while, yet. I will have to learn how to transport them around. I will have to buy a second walker for lab. It will be awkward to get everything into my car. I can’t wait until the braces come off to start walking. I can’t wait until crutches feel safe to start using them. If there is no uncertainty then you’ve missed the window for greatest growth. If I’m not scared of the next step it’s too late to take it.